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Parents Blog

Susan Boyd blogs on USYouthSoccer.org every Monday.  A dedicated mother and wife, Susan offers a truly unique perspective into the world of a "Soccer Mom". 

 

You Can't Prepare for Everything

Susan Boyd

Right now I am on an extended road trip which is ranging farther than any soccer trip we have made. On the plus side we are seeing parts of the country we have previously only flown over. On the down side we are trapped in a car for long stretches of time traveling through long empty expanses of landscape. All too often an exit sign will have as an auxiliary notice "no services for 106 miles." During a particularly desolate part of our journey in Utah the check engine light came on. Those of you who have followed my blog for awhile know that I had a Toyota van which I drove for three and a half years with the check engine light blazing. So with the hubris of experience, we continued on our journey on roads that rose from elevations of 2000 feet to 9000 feet and back down along long twists of no service. We assumed it was a faulty gas cap since we had just gotten gas when the light came on. According to the service book we had either put in the wrong type of gas (we didn't), or driven through a deep mud puddle shorting the electrical (it was 111 degrees out so that wasn't likely), or had a leaky gas cap.

Upon arriving in Las Vegas we took the car to a dealership where the mechanic also said, "Oh, it's just your gas cap. Give it a few cycles of readings to reset." And he was ready to send us on our way, but I asked if they had time to run the electronic diagnostic. An hour later we discovered that the clutch had burned out and by some act of mercy had not failed in the high plains desert. So after a day of repairs, we were ready to set out again.

Technically this qualifies as a soccer trip because I am delivering Robbie to college to play. So a lot of the same standards I have set for making soccer trips held true.  Since many of you will be departing soon for those late summer/early fall tournaments I'll just highlight some of the things you'll want to be sure to have in your car. I put these in a box that I can easily take out of the car if I want to leave it in the garage and which I can quickly pack into the car when the trips demand. Be sure you have toilet paper and paper towels. Believe me you'll thank me for this suggestion when you are faced with a row of portable toilets devoid of paper. Pack some wet ones preferably with alcohol for disinfecting. A good first aid kit can't be neglected which includes scissors, tape, a roll of gauze, and a finger splint besides band-aids, cortisone cream, pain relievers, anti-bacterial, rubber gloves, and cotton swabs. Include extra shin guards, shorts, underwear, and socks. Add a small pump and extra needles. Bring black and red electrical tape to change or add numbers on the back of shirts. Drop one or two small umbrellas in the corners of the box. Complete your kit with sunscreen and bug spray. I also throw in some brimmed hats to help when the parents' sideline faces directly into the sun. For later in the season and for the spring, you'll want to include a blanket and some plastic bags to line the car floor and to collect muddy uniforms. Bring lots and lots of water. I'm trying to wean myself from bottled water for the sake of the environment, so you might want to fill a few metal water bottles at home or bring a gallon jug of water to fill bottles at the fields. 

As some of you also know, I am always on the hunt for the perfect soccer chair. My last purchase was a chair that included a roof. During this past spring I kept very dry even during some rough downpours. But last week while leafing through a catalog I came across a chair where the seat was heated! It was a folding aluminum chair with a small side table for setting drinks and cell phones and on the opposite arm hung a bag with a multitude of pockets for books, programs, and odds and ends. Alas it lacked a roof, but a golf umbrella would fix that. All I would have to do is charge the chair up the night before and it would keep the charge for four hours. It also came with a car charger so I could refresh it while driving. I may order it once I get back home. That is if I survive this trip. I still have to make it three quarters of the way back across America and there are plenty of moving parts on the car that can break down.

This is my way of saying that no matter how much you prepare, the unexpected shoots down your preparations. I had a mechanic go over the car two nights before we left, but there was no way he could check the clutch. No matter how big your soccer box grows it will never cover every problem. So you have to latch on to the positives and forgive yourself for not having infallible foresight. Despite the crises of this trip, we have also made some special memories. Coming out of the Rockies we descended through Glenwood Canyon, where the space to place the freeway was so narrow, they had to construct a viaduct with the westbound traffic on top where the views were. So we lucked out on some spectacular sight-seeing. We also stopped in Utah at an off the road viewpoint to discover an amazing hidden canyon and huge red ripples of stone rising thousands of feet from the valley below us. Robbie ventured down to the edge of the canyon while I resisted the urge to say "that's far enough." He discovered a huge Utah Banded Gecko (we looked it up that night on the internet) that had bright orange and pink speckles. Outside of Denver we stopped at a restaurant for lunch and as we were leaving the restaurant a voice shouts, "Hey, Robbie Boyd!" A classmate from his high school in Milwaukee Wisconsin was eating lunch there with his parents. Now that's as serendipitous as you get - and a good conversation generator for several miles down the road.
 

No. 6 Coaching Licenses

Sam Snow

We believe that competitive level coaches should hold a minimum of a "D" License.  Recreation level coaches should hold a minimum of an "E" certificate, if they are coaching teenage players and an age appropriate Youth Module certificate if they are coaching children.  Coaches working at the top level (premier/classic) should hold a "C" License or National Diploma.  Ideally they should hold a "B" License and/or an Advanced National Diploma.

The overall intent here is to create minimum license requirements in the U.S.A. and to establish levels of license with commensurate levels of play.  We recommend that this implementation be completed by December 31, 2010.

The rationale for these requirements follows:
- To provide continuing education on the game in the United States of America.
- To ensure that American coaches have an equal opportunity for education and standards in the game as our domestic and foreign counterparts.  Many countries now require mandatory licensing.
- To create the appropriate training environment to minimize the risk of injury.  To provide information on the prevention and care of injury.
- To reduce the risk claims against negligence and to be accountable for background screening.
- To equal other sports such as softball and ice hockey who have established mandatory coaching education requirement policies.  Ice hockey's rationale is very similar to that of
U. S. Soccer. 

"The coaching education program of USA Hockey is committed to developing coaches through a comprehensive education program at all levels.  Since quality coaching is the single most important element affecting the athletes and the sport itself, the experience athletes' gain through participation will be a direct result of the coach's qualifications, education and competencies.  Therefore, it is paramount that we prepare our coaches through a comprehensive curriculum which follows the different levels of skill progressions for the development of players."
 

Players Train Player

Sam Snow

In our youth soccer environment the training sessions tend to fairly sterile in that the U7 team only practices with the U7 age group, girls only practice with girls and so forth. We have evolved into a situation where there's little interaction between age groups and sometimes gender too. By allowing this to continue we devolve our clubs into mere associations of loosely connected teams without allegiance to the club. We also miss out on opportunities for the players to help one another grow in the game. For example in soccer times past we had pick-up games with mixed ages and occasionally mixed gender. Now-a-days far too much of our training environment is isolated by age group and gender. We are missing out on the chance for older players to help the younger players learn a bit more about playing the game. Not all teaching of the game comes from coaches nor should it. Players should also learn from watching college, professional and USA national team matches. They can also learn from the players in their own soccer club at practices. The coaching leaders in a club should organize times for older teams to practice with a younger team. The U9 and U10 teams combine in a training session one day for example. The U14 boys team has a practice game versus the U17 girls team as another example. From this environment within the club the players help each other grow in the game, they get to know one another better and a feeling of club unity expands. They may also begin to support each other's matches. If the older players come and cheer now and then for the younger players at one of the matches the impact on self-esteem, confidence and club loyalty will be profound. When the younger players go to watch a match of an older team in the club the crowd atmosphere improves and the younger players are exposed intimately to a higher level of play. The older players could attend younger team training sessions to play alongside of them or help coach them or just to be the example of how to do certain ball skills. The possibilities are many if we take advantage of clubs with a full range of age groups developing players from within. So in a club these are the older age groups to come and help with the younger age group with training and to cheer at their games. The U12 age group works with the U6 age group. The U14 age group works with the U8 age group. The U16 age group works with the U10 age group. The U19 age group works with the U12 age group. The adult teams work with the U14, U16 and U19 age groups. Indeed players 16-years-old and older should be encouraged to play on both a youth team and an adult team.
 

Loyalty

Susan Boyd

As belts tightened across the nation, soccer clubs are no more immune to budget concerns than any family or organization. Most clubs operated on a thin margin of financial viability even in boom times, so they acutely feel the pinch now.   You'll hear the mantra of "loyalty" more incessantly than ever as clubs try to maintain membership and to attract more members. Unfortunately loyalty from the club's perspective is a one-way obligation and families who have given years of service to a club can find their sons and daughters cut from their teams when select tryouts are complete.  Ironically loyalty is a fickle concept.

Coaching directors brush off any criticism with "that's the way it is in the world of soccer." They are correct as far as professional clubs go. But this is youth soccer without paid contracts, sports agents, and back room negotiations. Soccer teams provide more than just a place to train and hopefully win. They provide a social center where parents feel strongly connected. Being cut from a team can be like being ostracized from a community. Youth clubs need to both expect and honor loyalty by being loyal themselves or they need to accept they can't offer loyalty in return so stop demanding it from their players and families. All too often youth clubs only want the pendulum to swing one direction. Loyal, but unskilled players rarely get consideration for their loyalty. On the swing side we all know the "star" player who misses practices, whose family rarely volunteers, and who bad-mouths the players and the coach, yet starts every game. Under the umbrella of loyalty, families expect fairness, they expect that the rules will apply to every player, and they expect some consideration for their loyalty. But youth clubs continue to apply the professional standard to their choices exposing loyal members to dismissal, while expecting members to accept the risk they may be cut, blindly stay true in the name of loyalty until then and not pursue better opportunities when they come up.

If clubs want to operate like professional teams bumping off players without consideration to their loyalty, then they have to accept the converse: that every day professional players defect from the club that nurtured them, gave them the biggest salary, and put up with their shenanigans. When another club dangles a more lucrative contract, loyalty flies out the window. Kids read and hear about this all the time, so they know how the real world works. It should be no surprise to youth clubs when a player leaves for his or her own reasons since these same clubs are willing to cut a kid when it serves their purposes. 

US Youth Soccer and local State Associations have attempted to put in rules that will temper this cut-throat atmosphere. But every rule has a thousand loopholes that clubs have expertly learned to maneuver. For example there's the rule that coaches can't recruit players in the weeks preceding tryouts. The reality is that recruiting happens all the time, just not directly by the coaches. Robbie got hand-written personal invitations from parents of players in other clubs asking him to consider trying out and touting the club's accomplishments. While the notes were clearly following a template created by someone in the club no one could fault the club for a recruiting violation. After all this was just a proud parent exercising his or her right to free speech! Even players will approach other players after a game in an attempt to get them to consider joining their team, a tactic that works much better if the recruiting team beats the player's team. And players on their own decide to make a switch without any recruiting happening at all. One family on Robbie's first select team was subjected to threats of a lawsuit because they "defected" and were made to endure dozens of phone calls asking them to admit that the player was recruited illegally when the kid actually left because he couldn't get along with one player. All this anger and politics seem unfitting for youth soccer.

In Wisconsin players have three days to consider an offer from a team, but most coaches will demand an answer the minute they call the player. Coaches will play the loyalty card stating that if the player "really wanted to play for this club" there would be no hesitation. Anxious players, faced with the possibility of not having a team, usually succumb to the pressure and agree immediately even if they are waiting on another team's offer. Coaches will attempt to limit where a player tries out by threatening that if a player doesn't show up for all days of try outs she forfeits the opportunity to play for the club. Players are supposed to be free to try out for any and all teams they want, but the reality is that they put their eggs in one basket because of intimidation. Naturally, most top players don't face intimidation because clubs recognize those players have the power to pick and choose.   So the equity that the rules attempt to create doesn't exist.

Loyalty to a club can be a noble concept, but turns out to be impractical as players make different decisions about their soccer future. Robbie's first club team still contains a few players from the original group, while Bryce's first club team completely dissolved at Under-15. Anything can happen with a team, so ultimately families need to decide what's best for them and for their children. There should be no rancor over making a change because change happens naturally in the course of life. In the case of soccer, players seek different opportunities such as less travel or tougher competition. Players may move because of the "grass is greener" belief or they may move because they want to be with friends. Clubs have no compunction about cutting a player, so families should have no guilt about leaving. Be true to your own ideals and family. Life is too short to sacrifice your own future to the questionable promises and demands of loyalty.